gusto ko 'to!

Sabi ko dun sa last post ko, dream namin maging mayaman ni Jai. When I asked him what his measurement of wealth is (wealth as in pera lang ha.. Hindi ito philosophical na post so let's do away with philosophical answers.. Hahaha, feeling! As if naman I write about anything philosophical!! Bwahaha!), his answer was if he could buy a Range Rover without thinking twice, yun na yun.


(Pero sa totoo lang, hindi ko masyado gusto ang itsura ng Range Rover na yan.. I am so in love with a CR-V, first and true love ko yun.. Or puwede na rin yung mga mahahabang sedans like Camry or Accord, lalalala...)

Since he's naturally a copycat (tee-hee), he asked me my question in return. I really just want to travel, yun ang sagot. Gusto ko yung every year, we can bring our kids to different countries. Or if I wanna splurge, I can go to Bangkok or Hong Kong in a jiffy. Astig yun! Gusto ko puno yung passport ko ng stamps at kailangan kong ipa-renew dahil wala nang space (hindi dahil expired na siya).


But my true love (kasing-level ng CR-V) is Santorini, Greece. Gusto ko talaga makapunta dun. I wanna see the white houses on the hills, the Aegean Sea, the Greek statues, mga mythology-ek-ek. When I see pictures of Greece, it reminds me of old times, nostalgic, vintage love but mixed with just the right amount of contemporary flavor.

So there :) 2 of our biggest dreams captured visually forever :) If we work hard enough, we'll get 'em :) So pag meron ng Range Rover sa garahe namin (na siyempre, remote-control-operated katulad nung kila Saraaaaaa!!!) at pag nagustuhan mo ang top ko at ang reply ko eh "I got this from Chatuchak Market... just yesterday", you'll know we did it! In short, dizzisit! =D

sa pinaka-special na Dude :)

Wala talaga akong ka-art-art, pasensiya :) The best I can come up with is a smiley face and 3 stars that don't really look like stars :(

You're soooo old =) Hahaha =)

Natutuwa lang ako kasi first time namin to celebrate his birthday. Malamang... kasi saglit pa lang kami, haaayy kulet ko talaga =) Ang saya lang din mag-reminisce...


One of our chats from waaaay back.. Why I kept it, hmm, let's just say I like keeping small memorabilia :) Masaya na ako sa mga ganung bagay :)

Note how I keep on calling him "Dude?" :) Hihihi. Ganun talaga ang tawag ko sa kanya dati.. Not just him, but mostly everyone I was with in NY. Nagamit ko nga rin kay Sara, at ang sagot niya sa'kin eh "Ganyan ba talaga tawagan niyo sa Manila?" Hehehe. Feeling ata ni Sara eh laking hiphop ako :P

Yung "dude" na tawag ko sa kanya, memorable, because at one point, he stopped responding to me pag yun ang tawag ko sa kanya and told me in very clear terms that he wants me to stop calling him like that. Dude, lambing kaya yun! Sus. Pero di na ako nakikipag-away pa :) Him telling me that sorta kinda signalled to me the turning of the page ;)

Thank you for the greeaaattt moments. Ni hindi nga tayo mayaman, pero ang dami kong gustong moments kasama ka. Sidenote: konting naiinggit kasi ako sa mga mayayaman kasi ang dami nilang "moments." Moments they experience dahil kaya nila mag-travel, mag-food trip without thinking twice about the bill, etc. But then I realize, mas gusto ko yung ganun.. Kasi masaya na nga kami ngayon, what more pag yumaman kami? Op kors, yan ang goal namin sa buhay, yumaman :) Hahaha, ang babaw! Tipong may ATM daw kami sa bahay kasi emergency, kelangan magpagawa ng elevator papuntang 2nd floor. He cracks me up, he really does :)

Pero seryoso, tamang kakain lang kami sa Binalot, masaya na kami :) Great company beats rich-and-famous-ambiance anytime, pare!! Puwede ring nasa McDo lang kami tapos biglang ang kakanta eh Backstreet Boys at *milagro*, alam namin pareho ang buong lyrics!!! Hahaha. Simple joys that leave an ear-to-ear smile on my face until I doze off.

I'm amazed at how short a time we've been together but I have so many memories of us already. Must be the NY bug :) Salamat sa kumpanya namin for unintentionally giving us the best gift ever.. Puwede po bang maulit??? Hehe. I fervently hope the memories don't stop here; I'm looking forward to thousands of days' worth of memories pa.

Again, Happy Birthday to the most wonderful man I know :) You're my pleasant surprise everyday :)

Lessons learned..

This is a pretty long article - I read it in the Philippine Star the day it came out. Was supposed to cut it out but my dad hasn't read the paper yet that day and I can't find it now among the heapfuls of newspaper stacked in our garage. Finally, was able to get a copy from Mr. Jim Paredes' blog(http://haringliwanag.pansitan.net/)

:) Thank you, Mr. Jim! :)

Let's just say, it struck a chord with me. Very personal, actually. As if he knew I'll be able to read it.


--
Lessons I learned from my ex-girlfriends
HUMMING IN MY UNIVERSE By Jim Paredes
Sunday, August 19, 2007

If I took all the girls I knew when I was single
And brought them all together for one night
I know they’d never match my sweet little imagination
‘Cause everything looks worse in black and white. — Paul Simon, Kodachrome

I had been sitting before my computer for two hours, thinking and staring and turning my chair around and around, truly stumped about what to write for today’s column. At the same time, I was chatting via the Internet with my wife Lydia, who is in another continent. When I asked her to give me some ideas, she suggested I write something personal since, she said, my most-appreciated articles have been those that I wrote about our marriage, our children, my parents and siblings, our household help, and our friends.

But I felt I had exhausted that topic, and there was nothing more I could think of that would be of interest to my readers.

I could hardly believe what came next. She actually suggested that I write about lessons I have learned from my ex-girlfriends. When I told her, only half-jokingly, that I could not believe the suggestion was coming from her, she laughed.

I am guessing that she feels comfortable with it since she has benefited from whatever positive lessons I have learned from the women who came before her. And, of course, I have by now learned infinitely more from her than from all of them put together. But I will save those lessons for another column.

I have four sisters, and growing up with them was a learning experience. They taught me a lot about what women are like and how they should be treated. But it was far more interesting learning those same lessons from girlfriends, since even just getting close to members of the opposite sex was much more exciting than being with family members.

Pursuing girls and getting them to be my girlfriends was very educational, to say the least. They not only taught me many things about women, romance, courtship, passion, and control, they also affirmed me as a man and as a human being many times over by just being with them.

One of my more memorable “teachers” was a beautiful fashion model who traveled extensively and was no stranger to the glamorous life in the capitals of the world. During one of her shows abroad, before we even met, their group was billeted in the same hotel as a world-famous pop band that was also on tour. One of the lead members took a fancy to her and gave her a gold Dunhill lighter as a souvenir. She told me this story with great excitement, so I knew how much she treasured that gift. And she brought it everywhere. Like most everyone else, we were smokers then; the link between death and cigarettes had not yet been established.

She was great to be with. We hung out for a few months — enough time to establish a meaningful relationship. But, sooner than we expected, she had to leave for one of her travels. The prospect of losing her, even only for a while, broke my heart. It was a big bad world out there, and there was no telling what would happen to us.

The night before she left, we had dinner, and amid a lot of romantic sentimentality and copious tears, she took out the lighter and, looking into my tear-filled eyes, she said, “Here, have this.” I was floored. I refused her gift, knowing she really was attached to it. But she said that it was precisely because it meant so much to her that she was giving it to me. If it was not valuable, what was the value in giving it away?

I was astounded. With that single, simple act, she taught me something about giving, and if only for this alone, I continue to treasure having met her.

I met a girl in college who was quite precocious compared to her peers. While many girls her age, though very attractive, seemed childishly cute and girlish, she exuded a mysterious womanly demeanor. She didn’t try to attract guys by wearing short skirts or heavy makeup. She was quietly beautiful, but though her beauty was unspectacular, she had a feminine mystique that could lure her prey. If she could corner you for even 20 minutes, you were a goner! And that’s how it all began.

I had met her before, but we never went beyond saying “hi” to each other. I never thought I could be attracted to her until that 20-minute window one night when there were hardly any people left at a party we were attending. It was 1 a.m., and she was waiting for her car to pick her up. I casually sat down beside her to keep her company, and we struck a conversation. I realized that she liked to talk about stuff that was different from other girls’ usual conversations, which enhanced her mystery. She was interested in Siddhartha and artsy movies! And she answered questions with just the right amount of coyness and charm to make you want to see her again. In other words, she could seduce you without you even knowing it.

Prior to meeting her, I thought I knew women. And from what I considered to be my vast experience in my previous relationships, I assumed that I belonged to the stronger, more dominant sex. To my surprise, when I started going out with this girl, it was almost always the other way around. She could have her way with me without my knowing it, and even when I did, I allowed her to, with my full consent! She defined what “cool” was in music, clothes, books, and lifestyle, and I readily followed.

Our relationship was powered mostly by her agenda. In many ways, she stretched my limits and introduced me to primal aspects of myself that I never suspected could ever matter to me. She could arouse jealousy, and awaken a sense of “sexist ownership,” which I did not know I was capable of.

We did not date for very long. I felt she was changing me too much, maybe into a person I did not want to be. But she did teach me an important lesson: that women can be very powerful — indeed, more powerful than men.

One of the longest relationships I had in my youth was with someone I met in senior high school. We went together for six years, and our relationship went through the gamut of teenage angst, “attitude” and discovery amid the backdrop of “flower power” from the late ’60s to the early ’70s. I describe those times as the Wonder Years of the heart.

To this day, when I hear certain songs, I remember the purity of the experience of post-adolescent joys and aches. Its Il Postino-like magic was both wonderful and devastatingly painful… or so it seemed then to the tender teen that I was. Perhaps it was because we were novices in matters of love and relationships that our experience was instinctive and instructive.

We fought a lot, which was painful, but we invariably reconciled, which was always exhilarating. At such a young age, feelings are oceanic and can totally engulf one’s being. We were young and we were foolish. It was probably the kind of relationship that inspired Shakespeare to write, centuries earlier: “Love is blind and lovers cannot see the petty follies that they themselves commit.”

Young love is truly unforgettable. But thank God, it is possible to get over it. Like everything else, the feelings pass, and you can get on with your life. What I learned from that relationship was that the taming of young love itself is necessary if one is to grow up. All that intensity is simply not sustainable. The fire can become a conflagration that consumes everything in its path. One eventually learns that the hearth of lasting love burns more slowly and surely.

We eventually broke up, and she left to study abroad. I went to see her when she returned for a brief visit home a year later. I remember an embarrassing but hilarious moment when she mistakenly called me by the name of her current boyfriend. This prompted her wise old dad, who was sitting with us in the living room, to drop the magazine he was reading, and tell her, with a wink, to call everyone “angel,” so she would never make the same mistake again!

We continue to be friends and get in touch occasionally via e-mail during birthdays, Christmas, and other special occasions.

I had other relationships with accompanying lessons, but all these happened so long ago, and the memories, though pleasant, are now far removed from my present reality. What remains relevant is what I learned from these women about women. As teachers go, girlfriends are the best source of learning for men about women.

I am forever grateful to all the women I’ve gone with for being the “angels” that they were, who taught me, each in her own way, how to understand women and how to love the one I am spending the rest of my life with better.

tagged by Karen

Instructions: Each player starts with 7 random facts/habits about themselves. People who are tagged need to write on their own blog about their seven things, as well as these rules.

At the end of your blog, you need to choose 7 people to get tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them that they have been tagged and to read your blog!

1) I never dreamt of becoming a doctor, a nurse, a teacher, a lawyer, or an accountant - the 5 most common ambitions among kids. Ang dream ko lang nun makapag-suot ng corporate attire katulad ng Mommy at Daddy ko. Kahit anong course basta ganun ang suot ko hehe.

2) Naiinis ako sa mukha ko. Kahit anong kain ko, ayaw tumaba. Seryoso. Kahit pataba nang pataba ang braso ko, yung mukha ko, parang stick pa rin. Arrgghhh. Eh ayaw ko pa naman yung naghahanap pa ako ng matabang angle pag nag-pipicture-an :( Gusto ko mataba kahit anong angle.

3) I've mentioned this before - one of my biggest dreams is to wear a ball gown :) Hehe. Hindi yung parang balloon na may petticoat ha... It just has to be floor-length.

4) Gross kung gross - pag naggugupit ako ng kuko sa paa, minsan inaamoy ko. Minsan lang talaga. Eh diba kadalasan mabaho yun? Alam ko. Gusto ko lang iconfirm kung mabaho ba talaga. Hehehe.

5) Contrary to popular belief, hindi ko type ang mga golfer-chinito-maputi-na-mukhang-mas-malinis-pa-sa'kin na lalaki. Eeewww. Baka mas madalas pa yan maligo sa'kin at mas marami pang moisturizer na nilalagay sa mukha. Gusto ko yung maginoo pero medyo bastos. Mga Paul Walker (nyay, complete na yung 5 foreign celebrities ko eh :() ang dating (kasi nanonood ako ng Eight Below habang sinusulat 'to eh). Or sige na nga, mala-Jai. Yun, perfect. Berday niya eh, pagbigyan =D

6) Secret dream ko ang makagawa ng fashion spread sa isang magazine. Ako yung model siyempre. Libre mangarap! Parang type ko yung endless choice of clothes, make-up, at makakita nang ilang rolls ng film na puro lang ako. Siyempre dapat fantastic yung hair and make-up ko, na tipong pag tumingin ako sa salamin, Bom, is that you??? Para di ako mahiya magpa-picture =)

7) I used to wet my bed and my school uniform till I was around 7, I think. Ang ginagawa ni Daddy, ako pinapalaba niya ng bedsheet ko kahit sobraaaang bigat. Wala pa kaming washing machine nun. Tapos pag nasa school, lagi ko iniistorbo si Manang Jen sa klase niya (or rather, iniistorbo siya ni Manong Guard na naaawa sa'kin) kasi kelangan ko nang pamalit underwear at skirt =)

Crap, ang hahaba ng sagot ko. Sorry!

I'M TAGGING: Jen, Mark, Jela, MG, Magsy, Di, Ana-gel

that time of the month again

Ang lungkot :(

Walang specific na reason. Pero napapansin ko pag month-end, parati ako malungkot. I don't get to spend time with people I love as much as I want to. Sabi nga sa isang training dito sa office, I'm more inclined towards nurturing relationships kaysa mag-concentrate sa work achievements.

Mommy ko lagi na lang nagccomment na "Parang nasa New York ka pa rin..". Hayyy. At mag-t-text out of the blue ng "Hi 'nak. Miss na kita." Huhu. Gusto ko man siya i-reassure na magkikita na kami that night, hindi puwede, kasi hindi ko hawak ang schedule ko.

Atleast ngayon, nagddrama na lang siya.. Dati kasi, nang-g-guilt trip pa :( Which is one of my least favorite things in the world. I would like to believe everyone tries their best to make ends meet, to make everyone happy. Kung puwede lang hatiin yung katawan ko, ginawa ko na. Hehe. This is one of the bigger reasons why my mom and I couldn't see eye to eye before - sobrang naiinis ako pag nang-g-guilt-trip siya so I sometimes snap at her, which she detests naman (understandably). She has mellowed in time (at dahil na rin pinaiintindi sa kanya ni Daddy how the corporate world works, hehe) and I think I have too.

But going back.. Guilt trips. I associate many emotions to it. Una, naiinis ako. Tapos, maya-maya, malulungkot na ako kasi iniisip ko kung may basis ba at kung san ako nagkulang. Pero dahil hindi pa mataas ang EQ ko, nahihirapan ako kalimutan na nainis ako. But this is mostly because I feel that I don't deserve to be felt guilty over something. Especially if you're someone whom I assume understands how my mind works and how I treasure people in my life.

I have a handful of close friends whom I really don't get to talk to often due to distance or different schedules or different lives (to be completely honest), but when we do see or talk to each other, it's as if it was only yesterday since we last got together. We feel sad because we could have gotten together earlier or more often, but rather than focus on that, we just catch up on each other's lives. At ang saya kasi wala yung inis na parang pinipigilan mo lumabas. And if there are people who I would really love to be beside me during the biggest events of my life, they would be it. Not because they don't make me feel guilty, but because we know how important we are to each other without the need to measure it every single time.

That's why I appreciate my mom all the more now. Okay lang yung nalulungkot siya na wala ako, kasi malungkot rin naman ako na hindi ko sila nakakasama. I'm still sleeping when they all leave for office or for school, tapos tulog na sila pagkarating ko. I appreciate that she understands that I really don't like the setup, but I somehow have to like it because it puts food on the table (hehe, joke lang :) Basta ganun..).

Hay, I hate month-ends :( Ang sakit na nga ng katawan ko, ang lungkot pa :(

breaktime

Two articles I found from my colleagues' blogs: KhayeB and Jericho :) Loved reading both so sharing with you guys as well :)

CLOSING CYCLES
Paolo Coelho

One always has to know when a stage comes to an end. If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through. Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters - whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished.

None of us can be in the present and the past at the same time, not even when we try to understand the things that happen to us. What has passed will not return: we cannot forever be children, late adolescents, sons that feel guilt or rancor towards our parents, lovers who day and night relive an affair with someone who has gone away and has not the least intention of coming back. Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go away.

Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them. Nobody plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing else.

Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person - nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need. This may sound so obvious, it may even be difficult, but it is very important.

Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.

---


Stop Comparing
Bo Sanchez

We live in a pathologically dissatisfied world. And I'm going to tell you why. Because we love to compare. Go around the world and discover that people aren't happy with their bodies.

Filipinos want to be fair-complexioned like Westerners, and so buy bleaching stuff. Westerners want to own bronzed bodies like ours, and so purchase tanning lotions. Those with moles have them removed, while those who don't strategically implant beauty spots. Some people want to shed a few pounds to look like Ally McBeal, while others want to gain some baby fat to look like Drew Barrymore.

When are we ever going to stop and simply be happy with how we look? We live in a sick world. I tell you. And that sickness is comparisonitis. Take a look at wealth.

When we drive our old Toyota, it really suits us fine. We feel blessed in fact when the rain pours outside and we feel snug and cozy on its faded upholstered seats. But the moment we see our own officemate (or neighbor, or buddy, or cousin, or brother) drive his sleek sky-blue, four-door, four-wheel-drive Rav4, we automatically feel like third class children of God. Next time we drive our bumpy, noisy, rusted, dilapidated Toyota (notice how all the defects come out all of a sudden?), we feel deprived, dispossessed, pariah, debased, and only a little higher than the insects of the earth.

Listen carefully. Bill Gates' total assets are worth $60 billion. That's more than the GNP of some small countries. Tiger Woods earns $80 million simply by smiling on TV in a Nike shirt. And the stars of the sitcom Friends are paid $50,000 per episode! My point? No matter how hard you work, there'll still be some people who will be richer than you are. And there'll be some people who will be more beautiful, have more sex appeal, have more boyfriends/girlfriends, and have more problems. Try it for once. Stop looking around. Don't compare!

Don't compare her nose with your nose.

Don't compare his wife with your wife.

Don't compare his salary with your salary.

Don't compare her breast size with your breast size.

Don't compare her kid's report card with your kid's report card.

Don't compare his prayer group with your prayer group.

Don't compare her/his cellulite deposits with your cellulite deposits.

Stop comparing and start living and you'll be happier with your life.

This is crucial: The most difficult thing in the world is to be who you are not. Pretending and trying to be someone else is the official pastime of the human race. (I don't think dogs and cats and cows and horses have this problem).

And the easiest thing in the world is to be yourself. Be happy. Live!

There must be a reason why God made you tall or short or fat or thin or bumpy all over.

Love who you are!

of bumps and bruises

Ma, look at my bruise =( O sige na nga, pasa.. It's really that big =(

Got it during our Paintball "War" the other day. Huhu. It's turning slightly grayish, and I have no idea what it will look like tomorrow. Hope it doesn't turn an ugly shade of yellow..

---

Someone told me a few bumps and bruises is always good for character. So literally, this bruise is good for me. Hehe. No, seriously, although it hurts like hell, I'm glad I have it =) It's my remembrance that I tried something new and I just realized, it's been a long time since I did something completely foreign to me.

I also realized I have very few bumps and bruises to talk about. I often hear this question - What is your biggest disappointment? Or biggest regret. Or biggest challenge in life. I can't think of any. And this is not to say that I get past whatever it is that life throws at me. It's the exact opposite, actually.

I'm afraid that I'm playing my cards a bit "too safe." I only go into something when I know there's a bigger chance of me emerging victorious at the end. Hence, no big disappointments. But then there's a trade-off: if you ask me what my biggest achievement is, I'll also fumble for an answer. No pain, no gain. True. Isn't it that the soldier who comes home with his battle-gear soiled with blood, full of cuts and wounds, is more celebrated than a soldier who goes back with not a single dent on his armor?

I've met people who have been through huge heartbreaks, big losses, life-changing events talaga. And I wonder why, at this age, I can't think of anything that really tore me apart. Sure, I've cried over things but then they're nothing compared to what other people go through. I don't know if I just choose to forget (like, I can't remember how exactly my childhood yaya scalded my leg with the iron.. You would think I'd remember something as big as that, right?) or if my life is really that mediocre?

Or... I can just think that I've been truly blessed.

from here to there

I envy people sometimes. They know who they are, who they're not - and completely embrace the whole package. They walk with their heads held high - they know that there may be a dozen others who are nicer, smarter, prettier, kinder, sexier, mas mabango, mas maputi (ano pa ba..) - but this doesn't bother them a bit.

In short:
They know their worth.

They're not perfect but they know they have something to offer, that there's probably more than a dozen people out there whose life they brighten just by being in it.

How does one know what he can offer? Does it come to you in that semi-second before you finally let yourself surrender to sleep? Does it need to be verbalized by someone close to your heart? Do you see it when you look in the mirror? If there's a surefire way to unravel this mystery, please let me know.

I remember back in HS, Belle was paying me a compliment. And my reply was "Utot mo." (really, I'm a boy. No sane girl would dare use that phrase. Tsk.) I carry that batang-kalyeng-sagot with me till now. It's ironic: "Thank you" is a phrase I say a lot to people - when they're doing something for me. But it escapes my teeny-weeny-brain when they see something in me that they like.

Sabi ko nga, I'd really love it if I could go back in time and waddle knee-deep in my memories to find out that exact moment when my insecurities started. Or how it started. I would imagine, it'd probably be one of the biggest cha-ching! moments in my life. Eureka! Ganun.

Someone once told me I'm too hard on myself. No, I don't feel the itch to be the prettiest, the nicest, or the smartest or whatever -est you can think of. I just have a hard time accepting that some people really do love me. And that maybe, just maybe, I'm a ray of sunshine for them.

There are nights when I'd just lie down and think of this mess I'm in. Some nights, I'd be strong and swear that tomorrow would be the start of a brand new me. That I'd bravely look in the mirror and tell myself "You're nice. You look decent. You're someone worth loving." Or liking, at the very least. But then there are also nights when it would be so difficult. I have no idea why.

But don't worry. I'm getting there.

half-wishing

How does one get on the good side of your boyfriend's family?

Jai has 8 other siblings (he's the eldest). Out of the 8, 6 are girls. And you know how mean and catty girls can be to other girls, right? Ah no, no, they're not mean to me, they're all actually very nice. But I think you'll agree with me that girls are more "mapag-mata" to other girls than boys are to girls. So I feel like a bug under a microscope most of the time.

Jai's a very cool kuya, and though he tells me that his sisters don't usually shower him with compliments (eh kasi ba naman, ang Kuya nila, laking-San Beda -- egotistic na kumbaga :P Hahaha, joke :)), I know they look up to him and love him to bits. Kaya, yikes, double the pressure.

Tipong, hindi ko alam kung mag-a-asal ate ba ako sa kanila or ka-barkada; hindi puwedeng masyadong malandi ang suot pero ayaw ko rin naman magdamit na parang wala akong ka-fashion-fashion-sense (ang tagaaaal ko magbihis pag lalabas kami kasama nila hahaha. Eh pag papunta sa office, I can get dressed 2 minutes flat.); nahihiya ako pag nakikipag-holding hands si Jai sa'kin sa harap nila kasi... basta. Maski sa Friendster, nakuuu, di ko alam kung okay lang na ako ang mag-add sa kanila kasi baka isipin ang feeling-feeling ko tapos ma-p-praning ako pag hindi nila ako inadd. Hehehe.

Me and my problems. Ang babaw ko talaga :)

But seriously, I love their family. They're extra nice to each other, and when I'm with them, I feel their closeness - to an extent that I wish I can be a part of it. And since Jai loves them (and I love them as well), their opinions matter to me. And I really really pray that they like me for him.