2mos since that fateful day

It's been nearly 2mos since November 8. Ano bang masasabi ko about the past 2mos? Hmm :) I refuse to make this a mommy blog, but I'm afraid it's gonna turn out to be one in some way... So please bear with me :)

The past 2mos have been... happy and sad and scary and nightmarish all at the same time. Grabe. I have newfound respect for all parents, my parents, most especially.. That's not to say na wala akong respeto sa kanila dati ha, pero grabe talaga :) This is one case when you really have to be one to know what others before you went through. I read a lot, and I read practically everything I could get my hands on the whole time I was pregnant, but nothing, nothing prepared me for the first 2mos... well, actually, it was the first 2 weeks when I would think - is this never gonna end??? As in, change his diapers, feed him, let him sleep, and again and again. Even his pedia commented on my eyebags na umaabot na ata hanggang leeg ko :D And it was when me and Jai would fight all the time :D I was soooo tired, cranky, grumpy, depressed, and whatever lousy mood you can think of :)

My lousy mood is completely understandable (for me, that is :)). I went through 24hrs of labor, and my contractions were coming every after 5-7minutes. And at every internal examination, I have to listen to my doctors say how far I still am from the finish line. And then at the end of it all, I still had to undergo a Cesarian Section :( I hate it because: 1) Goodbye 5 kids, hello 3 kids max; 2) Ang mahaaaaal!!!; 3) I wanted to the feel the urge to push my baby out sana.

I opted to breastfeed Khalel, and breastfeeding elicits uterine contractions even after delivery so kahit nasa bahay na ako, maya-maya parang may contractions pa rin. Traumatic talaga. And Khalel's a voracious eater, lahat ng sustansya ko sa katawan, gusto kainin. At parang minu-minuto gutom sya. At di madali mag-breastfeed ha :) My nipples sometimes bled, masakitttt talaga.

Plus I had post-partum depression (I think. Mild case lang naman.). Ask Jai! Everytime we talk about something, even about the most mundane things, I cry. Hahahaha :) Weirdo talaga. Lagi namamaga mata ko, wala na ngang tulog, iyak pa nang iyak.

It got better though :) Everything did - the depression, the breastfeeding, the sleepless nights. I wouldn't say I have it pat already but getting the hang of it little by little.

I read somewhere that parents should cherish this baby stage, because kids are only babies once, maya-maya, malaki na sila, and they'd refuse to be held, to be kissed, to be cuddled. Tama naman :) Kahit gaano pa tayo ka-puyat, isipin lang daw - this too shall pass. And I have to commend Jai - he's soooo patient. He would report for work the entire day and would still change diapers when he gets home, he gets up when Khalel cries and he'd massage my back pag sobrang pagod na ako :) :) :) Siya rin una nagsabi sa'kin na puyat lang yan, makaka-bawi rin tayo sa tulog :)

Sige, next time na lang ulit ako magkuwento, ang haba na eh :) Sorry, parang walang connect-connect yung mga pinagsususulat ko :)

Sad pala ako na malapit na ako bumalik sa office :(