present and future

I believe in the sun, even when it is not shining.
I believe in love, even when i do not feel it.
I believe in God, even when He is silent.

I remember a scene in Stepmom when Susan Sarandon wanted to tell Ed Harris that she had cancer, but Ed interrupted with some good news of his own – that he was going to ask Julia Roberts to marry him. After a couple of minutes, Susan asked him (not verbatim, but something to this effect):

How do you know this marriage is going to work and ours didn’t?

Now, I have no clue as to why Ed and Susan’s marriage didn’t work out, but let me take Susan’s question and chop it a bit. If asked on its own - How do you know that this relationship is going to work - I think the appropriate answer all the time is: it is going to work.

True, there are things out of our control, and we can only vouch for our own actions. But the premise is that, you, as that ½ that completes the relationship, are willing to see the partnership through. It’s a choice. It’s also a recognition that though there are so many things still uncertain, you take a leap of faith and hope that the other ½ of the relationship is with you in making the jump.

It’s a subtle promise that no matter what you go through, you’ll do your darnest best to make it work. No matter what. You stick it out when the going gets tough. You set aside previous mistakes and be always ready to forgive one more time. You become strong when the other is weak. And at the end of each day, you say “yes” to the same person.

I look at my parents and my beliefs are re-affirmed. I’ve seen them go through difficult times: my mom had to commute to work everyday even when she was already 9mos pregnant with Magsy, using our big kalderos as basins when they had to bathe us (wala kasi kami pambili dati ng maayos na paliguan), telling my older sister to go ahead and pick a bag of goodies while shopping for groceries and eventually putting it back on the shelf when my sister isn’t looking – financial problems that really leave a mark if you let them. I’ve also seen them emotionally distraught, whether brought about by each other or by circumstances, but after 27 years, they’re still together.

It’s truly ironic. Love can be so complicated. It makes you feel the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. Some days, you bask in each other’s presence while on other days, you feel you’re better off alone. It has the power to make your world go round, but it is that same power than can make your world stop in its tracks. But even with all of that, it’s the simplest thing, really, love is. You love someone. No ifs and buts, no in-betweens. It’s selfless, it’s 100% giving. No matter what nga. So in essence, it really is that simple.